Girl at the End of the World: My Escape from Fundamentalism in Search of Faith with a Future

(Paperback)

Publishing Details

Classifications

Physical Properties

Description

Elizabeth Esther grew up as the eldest and clearly favored granddaughter of the founder of a wacky, family-run sect of Jesus People. Enfolded in its xenophobic subculture, constantly prepped for the apocalypse, she was cut off from most contact with the larger world. At the hands of the faithful, she suffered physical abuse and nearly the loss of her faith. But perhaps the greatest loss was of her own sense of self- she was trained as a toddler to "disappear" for hours; as a teen, to confess sins real and imagined to her prying, autocratic grandmother; as a young wife, to serve and blindly obey her husband. She arrived in adulthood convinced that no one--God included--could know or love a woman who "wasn't even there." Realizing she had nothing to lose, Elizabeth did the unthinkable- she left church...and began the arduous journey toward authentic faith. Her story is by turns frightening, hilarious, heart-breaking, and inspiring. Ultimately, her message will be received as a cautionary tale for believers in Evangelical churches--especially those that depend on a cult of personality to pull in crowds and dollars. I was raised in a homegrown, fundamentalist Christian group-which is just a shorthand way of saying I'm classically trained in apocalyptic stockpiling, street preaching, and the King James Version of the Bible. I know hundreds of obscure nineteenth-century hymns by heart and have such razor sharp "modesty vision" that I can spot a miniskirt a mile away. Verily, verily I say unto thee, none of these highly specialized skills ever got me a job, but at least I'm all set for the end of the world. Selah. A story of mind control, the Apocalypse, and modest attire.Elizabeth Esther grew up in love with Jesus but in fear of daily spankings (to "break her will"). Trained in her family-run church to confess sins real and imagined, she knew her parents loved her and God probably hated her. Not until she was grown and married did she find the courage to attempt the unthinkable. To leave. In her memoir, readers will recognize questions every believer faces- When is spiritual zeal a gift, and when is it a trap What happens when a pastor holds unchecked sway over his followers And how can we leave behind the harm inflicted in the name of God without losing God in the process By turns hilarious and heartbreaking, Girl at the End of the World is a story of the lingering effects of spiritual abuse and the growing hope that God can still be good when His people fail. Includes reading group discussion guide and interview with the author

Reviews

Praise for Girl at the End of the World

What a story! Girl at the End of the World is witty, insightful, courageous, and compelling, the sort of book you plan to read in a week but finish in a day. Elizabeth Esther is a master storyteller who describes her journey out of fundamentalism with a powerful mix of tenderness and guts. With this debut, Esther sets herself apart as a remarkable writer and remarkable woman. This book is a gift, and I cannot commend it enough.
Rachel Held Evans, blogger and author of A Year of Biblical Womanhood

Sometimes hilarious, sometimes tragic, Girl at the End of the World provides an unflinching look at life growing up inside a fundamentalist cult. Elizabeth Esthers honest and vulnerable account of her childhood, and the effects of her parents religious zeal, is both fascinating and poignant. I couldnt put this book down. It will provide hope to anyone recovering from an upbringing where religiosity was emphasized over a relationship with God.
Kristen Howerton, author of RageAgainsttheMinivan.com

Girl at the End of the World is an unforgettable memoir. I white-knuckled its pages as I traveled through Elizabeth Esthers heartbreaking childhood. I cheered for her when she finally found freedom and grace. Its eye-opening, powerfully written, and offers a vital perspective in the conversation about fundamentalism and religious abuse.
Jason Boyett, author of O Me of Little Faith

Elizabeth Esthers story is a powerful account, and shes told it beautifully. As I read, I thought of my own memories of growing up in an evangelical church and wondered how theyve made me the person I am today. This book is a reminder that God is good and that He can redeem any story for His beloved childrenor as Elizabeth says, that God is big enough to meet us anywhere. Im so glad she has bravely told her tale.
Tsh Oxenreider, author of Notes from a Blue Bike: The Art of Living Intentionally in a Chaotic World

There is life on every page. Girl at the End of the World is evidence that sometimes our scars make the most beautiful art.
Josh James Riebock, author of Heroes and Monsters

A delightful book: funny and wise and rich with insight about God and faith. Even while Elizabeth tells the darker threads of her story, her innocence, wit, and spiritual exuberance shine brightly.
Matthew Paul Turner, author of Churched and Our Great Big American God

A memoir about childhood should not read like a seat-of-the-pants thriller, but Elizabeth Esthers does. And thats scary. I found myself wishing I could reach through the pages and hug that cowering, desperate girl, and tell her that God truly loves her. Im so glad she knows His devotion now, and so grateful that she is sharing her story so that we, as Gods ambassadors, can make sure abuse in the name of child training never happens again.
Sheila Wray Gregoire, author and blogger at ToLoveHonorandVacuum.com

Elizabeth shares with candor, wit, and near flawless writing about the religion she was so deeply hurt by. Her story is heartbreaking, yet redemptive, and we would all do well to pay attention to how religion without the love, grace, and truth of Jesus Christ is an empty and destructive force.
Sarah Mae, author of Desperate: Hope for the Mom Who Needs to Breathe

Author Bio

Elizabeth Esther is a popular blogger and advocate who has appeared on shows such as Fox News and Anderson Cooper Live. Elizabeth and her husband, Matthew, live with their five children in Santa Ana, California.