Nobody Needs to Know: A Memoir

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From intersex activist Pidgeon Pagonis comes a candid and life-affirming true story of identity, lies, family secrets, and the healing power of truth. Pidgeon Pagonis always felt like their life was a constant attempt to fit in with other girls-a feeling that was only exacerbated when puberty failed to hit. They never understood why...until they uncovered the secret that had haunted their childhood. Bouncing between their Chicago home and the city's children's hospital, Pidgeon weathered a series of traumatic surgeries, fabrications, and misdirections. It wasn't until college that Pidgeon pieced together the puzzle of their identity: they'd been born intersex but raised as a girl, their life shaped by lies that left them physically and mentally scarred. But for Pidgeon, what began as a shameful and traumatic discovery transforms into a painful yet joyous journey of self-love, truth, and healing. Pidgeon's inspiring memoir is for everyone whose body and spirit defy expectations, a fierce challenge to a system hell-bent on enforcing binary definitions. Ultimately, it's a celebration of the freedom and empowerment that come from learning the truth about who you are-and living it.

Reviews

A powerful, fierce, and vulnerable memoir that situates the fight for intersex rights against the backdrop of adolescence. Pagonis explores the nuance of bodiesof what it means to have a body as a houseand the ways that society and the medical industry have tried to flatten bodies into one-dimensional ideas. This book is a must-read, and as compelling as it is informative. Fatimah Asghar, author of When We Were Sisters A riveting memoir that illuminates one persons beautiful struggle against a system that denied their truth since birth. Nobody Needs to Know is critical to understanding intersex issues, and its also a striking story of growing up and into yourself. Each page brims with a heart-wrenching honesty and irrepressible spirit that anyone can see themselves in. Pidgeon is changing the world and actively destigmatizing the existence of people who arent simply male or female. This story inspires an essential process that brings us closer to respecting and appreciating a reality that is not binary and yet is one we all share. Pidgeon is a wonderful human being, a conduit for harmony, and an example of what change and growth can achieve. Please read this book! Indya Moore, actor, model, and advocate A remarkable book by a remarkable person. I highly recommend it; anyone reading this will come away with an awareness and appreciation of the challenges and beauty of a group of people who are as common in our everyday lives as identical twins or redheads yet are mostly invisible or misunderstood. Bruce D. Perry, MD, PhD, principal of the Neurosequential Network

Author Bio

Pidgeon Pagonis is an activist on behalf of intersex and marginalized people. They have advanced youth advocacy with interACT, launched an intersex YouTube channel, written for Everyday Feminism, cofounded the Intersex Justice Project (IJP) and the #EndIntersexSurgery campaign, and introduced the intersex and nonbinary clothing line Too Cute to Be Binary. Theyve created two short documentaries, The Son I Never Had, which premiered at Outfest, and A Normal Girl, which screened at the American Pavilion at the Cannes Film Festival; appeared on the cover of National Geographics Gender Revolution special issue; and been honored as an LGBT Champion of Change by the Obama White House. They are currently documenting intersex people of color for Physical Record, a new photo series subsidized by Astraeas Intersex Human Rights Fund. For more information visit www.pid.ge.