Vows: The Modern Genius of an Ancient Rite

(Hardback)

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From the bestselling author of Home Comforts comes the story of our wedding vowswhat they mean and why they still matter.

In the West, marrying is so thoroughly identified with ceremonial promises that taking vows is a synonym for getting married. So, its a surprise to realize that this custom is actually a historical and anthropological oddity. Most of the world, for most of history, married without making promises. And theres a reason for that. Marriage by vow presupposes free choice, and free choice makes a love-match possible. It is a very modern arrangement.

Vows is both a moving memoir of two marriages and a thoughtful meditation on marriage itself. Cheryl Mendelson tackles the sociology of commitment through our most traditional promises and shows why they endure. In considering the kind of marriage these vows entail, she helps answer some of lifes most urgent and personal of questions: Could I, would I, or should I make these promises to someone Using history and literature, the book describes the parameters of the behavior that traditional vows promise and, in doing so, answers a whole series of other questions: Why did wedding-by-vow arise only in the West Why are they recited in weddings around the world today Why have these vows lasted for nearly a thousand years Why does the kind of marriage promised in the vows survive

Reviews

"Written with a novelists empathy, in a lively style (the anonymizing mists of history), and with wide-ranging reference (one doesnt often meet Bishop Thomas Cranmer and guests of Geraldo Rivera in the same volume),Vowsis a fine marriage of author and subject.Whether or not you agree that marriages venerable vows still form the worlds best blueprint for happiness, you will be surprised and enlightened by Cheryl Mendelsons new book."

Thomas Mallon, author ofHenry and ClaraandFellow Travelers
"What a magnificent book. It is about promises and the words that express promises. But it is also about love and marriage and the role they have played in our lives over the ages. The authors learning is lightly worn, but it is profound. It is a long time since I have enjoyed a book this much and been as moved and affected by the wisdom behind it."

Alexander McCall Smith, bestselling author of No. 1 Ladies Detective Agency series

Author Bio

Cheryl Mendelson is a Harvard Law School graduate, a sometime philosophy professor, and a novelist (Morningside Heights and Love, Work, Children). In 1999, she authored the classic bestselling resource for every American household, Home Comforts. Born into a rural family in Greene County, Pennsylvania, she lives in New York City with her husband.