I Thought it Was Just Me (but it Isn'T): Telling the Truth About Perfectionism, Inadequacy and Power

(Paperback)

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Shame manifests itself in many ways. Addiction, perfectionism, fear and blame are just a few of the outward signs that Dr. Brene Brown discovered in her 6-year study of shame's effects on women. While shame is generally thought of as an emotion sequestered in the shadows of our psyches, I THOUGHT IT WAS JUST ME demonstrates the ways in which it is actually present in the most mundane and visible aspects of our lives - from our mental and physical health and body image to our relationships with our partners, our kids, our friends, our money and our work. After talking to hundreds of women and therapists, Dr. Brown is able to illuminate the myriad shaming influences that dominate our culture and explain why we are all vulnerable to shame. We live in a culture that tells us we must reject our bodies, reject our authentic stories and, ultimately, reject our true selves in order to fit in and be accepted. Outlining an empowering new approach that dispels judgment and awakens us to the genuine acceptance of ourselves and others, I THOUGHT IT WAS JUST ME begins a crucial new dialogue of hope. Through potent personal narratives and examples from real women, Brown identifies and explains four key elements that allow women to transform their shame into courage, compassion and connection.

Reviews

Brown offers insights and strategies for understanding shame and overcoming its power over women An interesting look at a debilitating emotion that stunts the potential of too many women.

Booklist

Brown is clearly passionate and knowledgeable about her subject and has a smooth writing style.

Library Journal

Shame is a profoundly debilitating emotion. It drives our fears of not being good enough. We can learn to feel shame about anything that is real about us --- our shape, our accent, our financial situation, our wrinkles, our size, our illness, or how we spend our day. I Thought It Was Just Me is an urgent and compelling invitation to examine our struggles with shame and to learn valuable tools to become our best, most authentic selves. Grounded in exceptional scholarship and filled with inspiring stories, this is one of those rare books that has the potential to turn lives around.

Harriet Lerner, Ph.D. author of The Dance of Anger

Bren Brown has written an insightful and informative study of a subject that leaves many women feeling trapped and powerless. Her analysis of how women are often caught in shame, is in itself liberating, and her thoughtful suggestions will help readers continue to free themselves from emotional debilitation in ways they may not even realize are possible. I Thought It Was Just Me can be a doorway to freedom and self-esteem for many, many readers.

Martha Beck, Ph.D., columnist, O, The Oprah Magazine, and author of Finding Your Own Northstar

"Bren Browns ability to explore shame and resilience with humor, vulnerability and honesty is both uplifting and liberating. If we want to change our lives, our relationships or even the world, we must start by understanding and overcoming the shame that keeps us silent. This important and hopeful book offers a bold new perspective on the power of telling our stories."

Professor Jody Williams, 1997 Nobel Peace Prize Recipient; Campaign Ambassador, International Campaign to Ban Landmines

"This is an important and inspiring book that offers understanding and validation to the painful feelings that come with the beliefs that we are not good enough or we should be different than who we are. Bren Brown walks us on a path that releases the shackles of inadequacy and leads us to embracing our authentic selves."

Author Bio

Dr. Brene Brown, PhD, LMSW,is a research professor at the University of Houston where she holds the Huffington Foundation-Brene Brown Endowed Chair at The Graduate College of Social Work. She has spent the past sixteen years studying courage, vulnerability, shame, and empathy and is the author of three #1 New York Times bestsellers -The Gifts of Imperfection,Daring Greatly, andRising Strong. Her latest book,Braving the Wilderness- The Quest for True Belonging and The Courage to Stand Alone, will be released Fall 2017. Brene's TED talk, "The Power of Vulnerability," is one of the top five most viewed TED talks in the world with over 30 million views. In addition to her research and writing, Brene is the Founder and CEO of BRAVE LEADERS INC - an organization that brings evidence-based courage building programs to teams, leaders, entrepreneurs, change makers, and culture shifters. Brene lives in Houston, Texas, with her husband, Steve, and their children, Ellen and Charlie.