Glop: Nontoxic, Expensive Ideas That Will Make You Look Ridiculous and Feel Pretentious

(Hardback)

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Description

A wickedly funny, full-color, illustrated sendup of the trendy lifestyle publication GOOP.

What is Glop

Glop is a business and a website. But Glop is also a feeling. Its about picking the right expensive organic eye cream that will make you fit seamlessly into the top tiers of high society and sits next to Bono at a 42-course seitan tasting dinner held in a sex dungeon deep beneath the North Pole. Glop is about being conscious to the tiny details of our liveswhat to eat, where to buy your cashmere yoga pants, which juice cleanse will remove the most mercury toxins from both your body and your cashmere yoga pants. Glop is about you.

In this scathingly humorous parody, Gabrielle Moss skewers the vanity, elitism, and silliness of the lifestyle website everyone loves to hate. Here are favorite recipes, detoxes, activities, cleanses, beauty tips, juice cleanses, vacation destinations, and a selection of hand creams that will open your third eyeplus lots of celebrity namedropping and more.

Glop includes everything from the silly to sublimemake-at-home stem cell moisturizing repair masques, weekend colonics, restorative yoga poses (for when Sting is mad at you about that thing you did), and even the freshest bones for your bone broth. Here, too, are Gs essential tips on parenthood, relationships, work and finances, entertaining, food (well, maybe not food), spirituality, beauty, fashion, home, gifts, kids, and more. Nothing in Glop is sacredexcept for a few Indian cows you cant afford.

Reviews

"[Glop] really is the perfect holiday gift for that friend who claims she reads Goop for the sake of irony, but has also non-ironically adopted the phrase "conscious uncoupling" into her everyday vernacular. You know the one." -- The Hollywood Reporter "...hilarious from start-to-finish. It's the perfect stocking stuffer for your one sister-in-law who reads celeb gossip obsessively and plans to deliver her firstborn baby to the sounds of whale calls and the scent of peppermint essential oil." -- Bustle "[Glop] bills itself as "wickedly funny," and I can confirm it is... How could you harness so much material into one book Could you Well, yes; [Gabrielle Moss] takes one concept and runs with it, committed and cheekily hilarious." -- Food52 "If you're among the many, many humans who hate-read Goop, you'll be psyched to know that Glop is the Goop parody book you've been hoping for... The book is truly a breath of fresh air for anyone who can't afford $9,000 Oxygen tanks from Fiji..." -- The Frisky "Love (or hate) Gwyneth Paltrow's impossibly everything lifestyle blog and brand Goop Then Gabrielle Moss' new tome, Glop...It's so LOL funny even Gwyneth might find herself smiling as she calls her attorneys for an injunction." -- San Francisco Chronicle "...poke fun at the one of the most pretentious, talked about, unaware celeb manifested sites with Glop... you'll laugh, but respect Gwyneth for being true to the only life she, and her circle, have known." -- It's Tillie "This wickedly funny, full-color, illustrated sendup of the trendy, pretentious celebrity website Goop is the perfect coffee table book for yourself or a friend!" -- Mama Fashionista

Author Bio

Gabrielle Moss has written for Slate, GQ.com, Bitch magazine, The Hairpin, Bustle, and many other fine publications. She lives in New York.