The Football Manifesto

(Paperback)

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Description

Popular football blogger Michael Tunison of KissingSuzyKolber.com offers the no-hold-barred rules and bylaws that every football fan should know in The Football Fans Manifesto. With humor and tough love, The Football Fan's Manifesto takes readers through the essential rules of fandom, such as picking a favorite team, and teaches them how to be true football fans.

The Football Fan's Ten Commandments

1. You Must Choose Your Team by the Age of Eight.
2. Value That Team Above All Else, Even Yourself.
3. Under No Circumstances Can You Switch Teams (And Expect to Live).
4. There is a Limit to the Amount of Merchandise You Can Own (But It's Very Generous).
5. Sportsmanship is for the Athletes. Fans Can Gloat Endlessly.
6. A Self-Induced Coma to Skip the Off-season is a Practical Solution to an Annoying Problem.
7. An Inoffensive Fantasy Football Name is a Lame Fantasy Football Name.
8. Wealth Doesn't Matter So Long As You Don't Have to Work Weekends.
9. Respect Superstitions. If Your Team Lost, It's Because You Jinxed Them.
10. In Life, the Order of Importance: Football First, Football Second, Football Third, Family . . . uh, I Don't Know, twelfth

These are just the basics if you wish to be a True Football Fan. The full picture is much more complex and boozy. Thankfully,The Football Fan's Manifestois your very own playbook to the strict rules and bylaws that must be scrupulously observed. After all, trash-talking is an intricate science and running onto the field a dangerous but irresistible pursuit. There are many lessons to be learned, especially that choosing a favorite team to live and die with is not a choice made easily: It's the most important decision of your life!

Reviews

"The Football Fan's Manifesto is the throbbing id of the NFL, a throwdown in the name of football supremacy, the type of book you just know Roger Goodell wishes he could write. If you think football is the only thing that matters on earth, this is your book ." -- Will Leitch, author of God Save The Fan and founder of Deadspin

"Fantasy football fans that don't read Michael Tunison's book and recognize it as the gospel truth aren't real football fans." -- Gregg Rosenthal, Rotoworld.com

Author Bio

MICHAEL TUNISON is a sports blogger and freelance writer. The co-editor of the NFL blog Kissing Suzy Kolber, Tunison is also a contributing writer for Deadspin, With Leather, Pro Football Talk, and Yahoos Shut Down Corner. He lives in Alexandria, VA.