Surviving: Why We Stay and How We Leave Abusive Relationships

(Paperback)

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One Saturday morning, Beverly Gooden is woken by her husband shoving her off the bed. She makes to flee, but he catches her, his sudden anger inexplicable. No words are exchanged. He begins to strangle her - as he has done many times before.

With unflinching vulnerability, Gooden outlines in painstaking detail what she had to do to walk away from violence and control, and how others can use her experiences to escape their own abuse, from skimming the grocery money, to squirreling away personal belongings, to navigating a domestic violence shelter. She offers strategies for overcoming the barriers survivors often face, such as money, housing, overcritical social circles, or, most powerfully: love. Uniquely compassionate when it comes to the heartbreak of still loving one's abuser, Gooden shares how she transformed and extended this love outward, using her story to encourage others to choose themselves.

The voice and fire behind #WhyIStayed, Bev Gooden is exceptionally positioned to explore the many reasons victims stay in abusive relationships, and how they can muster the resources and motivation to leave.

Surviving is unlike any other memoir of survivorship, given its nuance, compassion, and candour. Above all, it is an exquisitely powerful testament to Gooden's healing, survivorship, and dedication to helping others do the same.

Reviews

Beverly Gooden has written a brave, powerful, intimate book that takes us inside the dynamics of abusive relationships-why people stay, and how hard it can be to leave. The gift of Surviving is Beverly's honesty. Read Surviving to know that you are not alone in your own journey toward self-love after abuse. You will find yourself growing stronger with each page. * Sasha Cagen, feminist life coach and author of 'Quirkyalone: A Manifesto for Uncompromising Romantics' *
So much courage and deep understanding of the complex dynamics of abuse. * Leslie Morgan Steiner, New York Times-bestselling author of Crazy Love *
Beverly Gooden's book is timely - and her honesty is both illuminating, helpful, and cathartic. It's not easy to tell the truth, but it's necessary. * Amy Richards, writer, editor, and cofounder of Soapbox, Inc. *

Author Bio

Bev Gooden is an artist, writer, and creator of the viral social media movement, #WhyIStayed. She earned a master's degree in social justice from Loyola University Chicago where she wrote her thesis on institutional responses to single women experiencing intimate partner violence. Her work has appeared in The New York Times, the Washington Post, and Time. She has been interviewed on Good Morning America, NPR's On Point and All Things Considered, and NBC's The Today Show, among other outlets. She lives in Houston, TX, USA.