Text Me When You Get Home: The Evolution and Triumph of Modern Female Friendships

(Paperback)

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A personal and sociological examination-and ultimately a celebration-of the evolution of female friendship in pop culture and modern society A personal and sociological examination--and ultimately a celebration--of the evolution of female friendship in pop culture and modern society "Text me when you get home." After joyful nights out together, female friends say this to one another as a way of cementing their love. It's about safety; but more than that, it's about solidarity. From Broad City to Big Little Lies to what women say about their own best friends, the stories we're telling about female friendship have changed. What used to be written off as infighting between mean girls or disposable relationships that would be tossed as soon as a guy came along are no longer described like that. Now, we're lifting up our female friendships to the same level as our other important relationships, saying they matter just as much as the bonds we have with our romantic partners, children, parents, or siblings. Journalist Kayleen Schaefer relays her journey of modern female friendship- from being a competitive teenager to trying to be one of the guys in the workplace to ultimately awakening to the power of female friendship and the soulmates, girl squads, and chosen families that come with it. Schaefer has put together a completely new sociological perspective on the way we see our friends today, one that includes interviews with dozens of other women across the country- historians, creators of the most iconic films and television shows about female friendship (and Galentine's Day!), celebrities, authors, and other experts. The end result is a validation of female friendship that's never existed before.

Reviews

Praise for Text Me When You Get Home

A memoir of female friendship issues a call to action for BFFs everywhere.The New York Times Book Review

Text Mehas the thrills and laughs of a romantic comedy, but with an inverted message: There just isn't only one love story in our lives, Schaefer writes. If you're lucky, friends will be the protagonists in these multiple love stories. It's high time that we start seeing it that way.NPR.org

Schaefer traces the evolution of female friendship in this thoughtfully reported book. Its insightful cultural criticism makes for an especially valuable read in the #MeToo era.Entertainment Weekly

Uplifting.People

Text Me When You Get Home is journalist Kayleen Schaefers love letter to her friends. Schaefer rejects the idea that womens friendships are rife with dysfunction and that women themselves are somehow dysfunctional, a concept that she shows remains strong in popular cultureSchaefer shows that, contrary to pop cultures emphasis on catfights and frenemies, womens friendships are stabilizing and joyful.The Washington Post

[A] witty, deep memoir [that] digs into the power and the glory of female friendships...Where to start unpacking the good news that Kayleen Schaefer broadcasts in her timely, nimble, essential memoir...Every page of this book has something valuable to impart about the necessity of fostering female bonds and tending them with the same care we give to our relationships with family, spouses, and children.Elle

ReadingText Me When You Get Homefeels like experiencing its subjectthe intimate, slow-burning, miraculously comfortable thrill of making and keeping a lifelong friend. Kayleen Schaefers affectionate and clear-sighted exploration of female friendship is as romantic as a movie and as honest as the conversation on the third day of a road trip; reading it is as delightful as walking into a bar on a weeknight to see your friend already seated and ordering your drink.Jia Tolentino, staff writer atThe New Yorker

Schaefer certainly puts friends first inText Me When You Get Home, a love letter to the power of female friendships in a world that would rather believe women are catty. From the friendship stories of everyday women to the evolution of cultural representation of womens friendships, this uplifting book celebrates the friends who can be just as important (or more so) than our romantic partners.Parade.com

Illuminating and uplifting Text Me When You Get Homewill remind you of what a good friendship is supposed to look like, and inspire you to nurture your relationships with the strong women around you.Bustle

A hopeful celebration of women's friendships.Kirkus Reviews

The title speaks for itself: I constantly say those exact words to my friends when we part ways or to my sister when she goes out for a run alone...Schaefers work is a great addition to this trend (and your bookshelf).Outside Magazine

Schaefer creates a beautiful portrait of how modern female friendship has evolved to be a positive force that is making women stronger than ever....She artfully explains how the intense bond we experience as friends carries us through many different eras of our lives anddispels the idea that female friends are less important than romantic relationships, family, or careers....You will find something in this book that will make you want to text your own person and tell her how much she means to you.Buzzfeed, Favorite Books of 2018

Text me when you get home. Those six words aren't just about getting home safely at the end of the nightthey're really a story about how special and fierce friendships are between women.NPR's Book Concierge

[Schaefers] book about the incredible, complicated bonds of female friendship is relatable, familiar, and subverts the false notion that women are predisposed to hating each other.Mental Floss

This is a really good summer read to make you appreciate your friends. So just pick up a copy and you can finish it at the pool in like, a day. Just try not to cry in public.The Betches

Text Me When You Get Home offers a new sociological perspectiveas well as a celebrationof female friendships today.PopSugar

I went to an all-girls boarding school, so I thought I had a PhD in female friendship, but Text Me When You Get Homeput me in my place.Town & Country, Editor's Pick

I was deeply moved by this book. I cried and I laughed. I recognized myself in it. I felt raised up and also challenged. It felt like a delicious, long overdue conversation with a best friend I didnt know I had. I will be giving this book to all my girlfriends.Lennon Parham,creator, writer and star ofBest Friends ForeverandPlaying House

Warning: this absolutely delightful and insightful book on the immense power of female friendship will make you book a trip to visit your college best friend immediately. You might even buy Beyonc tickets. Its that good.Jessica St. Clair,creator, writer and star ofBest Friends ForeverandPlaying House

Heres a book to devour in two sittings....Readers of all generations will enjoy her engaging writing and may see their own friendships reflected in her stories.Booklist

Part social history, part personal narrative,Text Me When You Get Homeis a Valentine to female friendship.ShelfAwareness

Arefreshing read that really gets at the heart of why portrayals on Insecure, Broad City, and everything in-between so greatly resonate.Bitch Media

This in-depth look into the evolution of female friendship is one all women will benefit from this year.Working Mother

Author Bio

Kayleen Schaefer is a journalist and author of the bestselling Kindle Single memoir Fade Out. Her work has appeared in The New York Times, Vanity Fair, The New Yorker, Vogue, and many other publications. She currently lives in New York City, and Text Me When You Get Home is her first book.