Crossroads at Midlife: Your Aging Parents, Your Emotions, and Your Self

(Paperback)

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With medical science, health care, and healthy lifestyles extending our lifespans as never before, more and more midlife adults are finding themselves caring for their aging parents. This role can trigger not only logistical and financial challenges, but also great emotional upheaval. There is a reversal of roles as the childoften in the midst of raising his or her own adolescent or young adult offspringbecomes the caretaker of the parent. A parent's aging and mortality elicits strong feelings of loss, and a stark realization of one's own aging and mortality. Past, present, and future paths converge, and the caretaker is at the center of that crossroads. Psychologist Pravera specialist working with such caretakersshows us their inner worlds, and how they used a difficult point in their lives to embark on a journey of self-understanding and self-transformationa journey toward a more meaningful life for themselves. Readers can gain a better understanding of their own lives and know they are not alone in their struggles to contend with and find powerful benefits from the emotional side of caring for an aging parent. Distress can become peace of mind, as we see in the stories of men and women who sought Praver's help. Relationships that might be weakened by a caretaker rolerelationships between caretakers and their children, spouses, and friendscan actually grow stronger with the experience. Profound issues affecting caretakers are shared in this evocative book, which is an enlightening and enjoyable read.

Reviews

Unlike most other books on caring for an aging parent, this one emphasizes the opportunities for middle-aged caregivers to grow and change as they negotiate the demands of aging parents and, often at the same time, those of the increasingly independent adolescent and young adult children. . . . [I]nsightful. Public libraries will want to purchase it for the many baby boomers now facing these problems and seeking guidance. * Library Journal *
[A]n informative and insightful look at midlife. . . . With her emphasis on midlife as a time for personal enlightenment and growth, Praver encourages readers to embrace this phase of their lives. * Booklist *
Crossroads at Midlife takes an honest unflinching look at the emotional upheaval that men and women confront at this critical juncture in their own lives . . . Dr.Frances Cohen Praver's inspirational message of embarking on a journey of exploration and self-transformation in order to create the remaining years with meaning is based on her personal experience. . . . Powerful emotions and inner conflicts evoked by aging parents leave caretakers feeling torn. . . . The author shares therapy tools to help readers take control of inner states so that they can empathize with parents and themselves. Then they can better provide care with kindness and compassion. * The Leader *

Author Bio

Frances Cohen Praver, PhD, is a clinical psychologist and psychoanalyst working primarily with middle-aged people and couples caring for aging parents. She has appeared on television shows including Good Morning America and The Phil Donahue Show, and has lectured on trauma and traumatic stress in Grand Rounds at several hospitals.